Review: Macy’s Diner ★★★★★
Macy’s Diner is easily the worst place I dined at in the Philippines, and one of the worst places I’ve been to in the world. I really had high hopes. They were actually on the top of my list for places to eat at in Laoag.
Macy’s Diner; Not An American Dinner!
As soon as I entered I got a bad feeling. Something about the place felt off, and I still can’t put my finger on what it was. Maybe it was because the place was kind of empty. Or maybe it was poor lighting. It could have been that the seats were terribly uncomfortable, and I tried out several tables. Probably a combination of everything.
The staff brought over a menu, and this was the first major red flag. They describe themselves as an “American” diner, but they are not. Sure, they look like an American diner, but looks do not make a diner. The food does, and here the menu is almost exclusively Filipino. This got me really worried, so I decide not to order any food. I opted for just a coffee, and I would see how things went from there.
After a few minutes, one of the younger waitresses brought over a large white cup of coffee and glass plate. On the glass plate was two packets of sugar, a wooden stirrer, and package of powdered creamer. If a wooden stirrer didn’t set off alarm bells, the powdered creamer most certainly should have. I was dumbfounded that a proper sit-down restaurant would give powered creamer to a customer that was eating in. This was some backwoods, second-rate, gas station joke. I will go the record here and say that I expect heavy cream when ordering a coffee at a restaurant. At the very least, they must provide milk if cream is too hard to come by in the area. This was just inexcusable.
I’m Not A Coffee Snob… REALLY
I have choke down more subpar cups of joe than I can count throughout college, on film sets, and on road trips to the ends of the Earth. I like my coffee unsweetened and with a slash of color. That said, I am perfectly happy to have my coffee black, but the brew must be high quality.
I took a sip from the white cup in front of me, and it should come as no surprise that it was just godawful. One of the worst tasting cups of coffee I’ve had the displeasure of putting in my mouth. I am racking my brain trying to think of how best to describe this terrible cup of coffee, but I just can’t evoke the right words that would do it justice.
With some proper cream and a massive amount of sugar to mask the taste, I think I could have imbibed most of the cup, but alas that was not the road I would be going down on this day. I called the waitress over, asked for the check, paid, and left the full cup of coffee sitting on the table as a clear sign of my displeasure.
I thank whatever powers that be that I followed my instinct and didn’t order any food here.
Should you wish to try the worst cup of coffee in the Philippines, you can find the contact information for Macy’s Diner below. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Need more information about the Philippines?
View our full write up on Laoag HERE.
Look at our full write up on Vigan HERE.
Check out our full write up on Manila HERE. (Coming soon)
See our full write up on Angeles City HERE. (Coming soon)
Read our full write up on Cebu HERE. (Coming soon)
Contact & General Information
Price: Inexpensive
Hours: 10am-8pm
Website: Macy’s Diner (facebook)
Location: Google
